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so sleep alone tonight
This blog belongs to CRYSTAL. It documents her musings, rants and the many anti-climatic events in her life, so read at your own risk! PS She thinks her dad reads her blog. |
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about the author
CRYSTAL is thankful to have finally graduated from the Raffles family in 2009. She is not so ready to embark on the new phase of her life and she still enjoying bumming around. If being a slacker is an occupation, she'd be a millionaire(: shoutouts
affiliates
AilinClaire Charlene Chern Ping Crystal Lee Davina Enqi Fadhilah Fanglin Fann FourOhEight '07 Huiwen Isabel Jasmine Jiahui Jolene Maryam Munchin' Mamas Natalia Natalia Peiting Pingfang Ruiling Saniah Samantha Serene Sheena Sherry Sipei Sorna Theodora The Red Jewel Yanqi Yunting Zhixian archives
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed |
this blog is so dead noone comes here anymore. plus, the stupid red cross on the top left hand corner of my blog is starting to annoy me. i need a brand new blog and url to document phase 2 of my life. in other words, leave this whole fiasco of what we call a JC life behind me and start on a clean slate. undoubtedly, As have been a big part of everyone's lives ( as can been seen by the many many blog entries from blogs concerning As) Since aparently its the in thing right now to blog about it, i shall jump onto the bandwagon too hoho. --- the end is near. wasn't that what everyone is waiting for? but somehow i think when the end is HERE, i'll be even more lost and aimless. i deduce i am in the midst of a teenage crisis. aimless, goaless and directionless. guess SMART goal setting lessons weren't very useful. what i want to do is just leave this whole shit behind (run away to some tropical island and live there with the cows grazing on the grass and have a cute dog named fluffy. but we all know that's not gonna happen.) i wonder how long this is gonna haunt me. probably can't get away from this anytime soon. we get like what, 3 months of psuedo liberation, and then the shitty results come back and i'll have to worry about what shitty uni courses my shitty grades can get me into. i forsee another 6 more months of unhappiness on my part hoho. but that's ok. i'll just have to stop living up to other people's own expectations and live my own life right? i'm sorry but that's easier said than done. this year i asked myself, why the hell am i studying? i dont even like the subjects im studying. i presume it's to get my As, prettily documented on a laminated sheet of paper which supposedly is tantamount to my self worth. but if it makes my parents happy, sure. study it is then. i don't get the emphasis placed on getting your 4 As. ok As are goods, but sometimes to the point of compromising on your sanity? i think i still can't comprehend this logic. but ultimately you know what sucks most? it sucks to have it once, then taken away from you just like that. i have to deal with that. it sucks that i have people around me complaining and whining. come on, just be glad you're not in my situation okay? you have no idea what i went through and what i had to deal with. you can never understand so don't try to do it. all in all, i guess i did take something good out of this. i experienced failure and i kinda survived it. i was pushed to my limits and i guess i finally know the mental capacity which i have. but i still like to believe there is more to life than this. i'll just take phase 2 as it comes. |